Got That Monkey Off My Back

Dear Reader,

As you might have guessed by now, when I like a place a lot I try to go there as often as possible. In my case this usually means no more than once per year with some local exceptions such as San Francisco. John and I used to go to New Orleans twice per year but then the economy bombed and well you know the rest.

Some places, Paris for instance, I can never get enough of no matter how many times I've visited. It never mattered to me once if I didn't manage to visit the Louvre, which I didn't until my fifth visit to the most beautiful city in the world, because I knew I'd return. Other places that I love to visit often are Carcassonne, France, not for the sights but for the ambience and just being there. John and I have lots of places in Europe we feel that way about: Venice, Arles, France, Sarlat, France, Dinan, Brittany, York, England, Edinburgh, Scotland, Orvieto, Italy, Sorrento, Italy, just to name a few, where we enjoy being and strolling and people watching rather than for sightseeing. They all have sights, for sure, but once you've seen them, then the real fun begins.

There are other places, however, that I have visited repeatedly for a completely other reason: To get that Monkey off my back. If I visit a town or area with a major sight and for some reason cannot see it because it is closed on Mondays or it's a major holiday or there's a fete in town or the Pope is visiting or daylight savings time, for whatever reason, it really burns me up and I get determined to remedy that situation by re-visiting in the future and touring that major sight. Over the last 27 years everyone of these reasons has caused me to miss a sight I was set on seeing. Sometimes the sight is the only reason I went there in the first place which really bums me out.

I call this determination "Getting that monkey off my back" so that I can move on and see new places and sights. Just like ESPN sportscasters love to repeat over and over again: "Will he ever get that monkey off his back?" Or "Do you think he'll get that monkey off his back tonight?" I can't wait to get it off my back. I remember how long Steve Young of the 49ers had to hear that stupid phrase until he finally won his Super Bowl. I could just see that hairy creature slide off his head and down to the ground where, hopefully Steve stomped the crap out of it.

Firenze or as we call it, Florence, Italy was a huge monkey on my back. In fact it was a gorilla. The first time we visited was on our first trip to Europe and we were on the run from place to place constantly. We did the best we could with 2-3 days but really couldn't make a dent in the place. To make things worse, Firenze can be quite hot and humid, has little public transportation to speak of and is really hard on the feet. The city is jam packed with major sights, all of which must be seen but none so important as the famous Uffizi Art Gallery. The Uffizi reminded me of a very large prison when I first laid eyes on it with miles of arches. The Piazza della Signoria on the other hand is bustling with people, bars and gelaterias. We had already toured the Duomo, the Bapistery, climbed Giotto's Tower, walked the Via Calzaiuoli, visited Santa Croce and crossed the Ponte Veccio to the other side of the Fiume' river. We made one of our earliest executive decisions about taking full advantage of enjoying a place and decided to skip the Uffizi on that trip. We'll see it next time, we agreed.

Seven or more visits later we still had not toured the Uffizi, not necessarily by choice so that monkey kept growing and growing. One year there was a terrorist bombing, a car bomb was driven into the Uffizi two weeks before our visit so it was closed. Another year there had been a terrible flood and much damage to the building so the Uffizi was closed. Another year, determined to see it, we followed the advice of a well known travel guru who advised it best to visit after 3:00PM but when we got there we found a huge line several people deep which extended the full length of the building. This was just too much. I began to wonder if the Uffizi is really worth all of this trouble. But my shoulders continued to sag as the weight of the giant monkey became more and more.

On one final attempt I had a stroke of luck. The Uffizi had developed their own website where tourists could purchase tickets in advance and choose a time to visit by appointment. I decided to give it a try and we went once again. There was a huge line outside and I was very disappointed until the ticket clerk waved us past the line and allowed us inside straight away. I felt giddy as a child running through the hallways, fighting my way through crowds of Japanese tourists taking photos of every painting and sublimely astonished at the sight of the original Botticeli's Three Graces and the Birth of Venus. Now I was happy. There are rooms filled with DaVincis and Michelangelos as well as Rafael, Titan, Reubens and the list goes on. The rooms are intimate and make enjoyment of each painting easy but one of my favorite sights in the museum is the hall of Roman emperor's busts. I swear they must have every single Roman emperor's likeness along with a lot of wives, children and anonymous boys. It was great to be face to face with the actual face of Augustus and Julius Caesar and the evil Livia.

We still visit Firenze, of course, when in Northern Italy and have enjoyed many more of the sights and the beauty of the place, not to mention some of the best food I've eaten anywhere. John always wants me to mention Il Latini because it is his favorite restaurant and we always try to eat one dinner there. Even though it is highly popular and in almost every guide book now, the quality and the fun atmosphere have not changed since we first ate there in 1983. They have two seatings only and you usually have to share a table with strangers, which is the best part, besides the food of course. It's a bit hard to find but once you find the right street you'll know it by the large crowd waiting outside drinking wine and eating prosciuto which is handed out on trays by the man in charge, The Bull. He keeps everyone happy while waiting and decides who gets to go inside next. It reminded John of the movie Casablanca waiting for the visas to arrive so you can get out of that place and away from the Nazi threat. Once seated the waiters bring course after course of food on large platters along with an endless bottle of Chianti. You get to choose between several primis and secondis and also desert but the antipastis are some of everything. After dinner they brought lemoncello to top it off. It's a set price meal with everything included and a bit pricey for some but definitely worth it.

The newest monkey to climb onto my back was the Acropolis in Athens, Greece. Our first visit was four years ago and the vacation got off to a very rocky start. We had flown for nine hours to London Heathrow Airport arriving at 6:00AM only to be forced into a holding pattern for an hour and one half because there had been an accident on one of the runways and they had to clean it up. By the time we got off the plane, through customs and then ran all the way from terminal one to terminal five we missed our connecting Swiss Air flight to Athens via Zurich. This was a long long run involving loads of escalators, another security check, and finally a bus ride to get there. Then the final run to the Swiss Air gates where we saw the attendant closing the door. We could see our aircraft sitting on the other side with the ramp still attached but she refused to re-open the door for us and let us board. This was very frustrating and we were very tired from lack of sleep, a 4 mile run and very sweaty. We were told to visit United Airlines's customer service desk which was, guess where?, back at terminal one.

We returned to terminal one much more slowly than we had left it and explained our dilemma to the agent. He was terrific. The next Swiss Air flight was not leaving for four hours and we would not have arrived in Athens until after midnight. I was terrified because the Athens metro stops running at midnight and we would have no way to get to our hotel. Worse yet, we would have to take a taxi which are notorious in Athens for ripping off the customers and taking extra long routes. After that we would have to attempt to navigate in the dark streets of the Placa, the old city to find our hotel. This looked bad so the very helpful agent said he would attempt to place us on another airline leaving sooner and to give him some time to do this.

We sat down, heads hanging low and totally bummed out when I looked over and noticed a nice gentleman offering tastes of Scotch whiskey to customers in his duty free shop. I pointed it out to John even though it was only about 9:00AM and suggested he go taste some Scotch. This he did and he tasted some excellent and some very old single malts. He returned with a smile on his face which really helped our circumstances.

When the agent called us back he had good news. He had put us on a non-stop British Airways flight to Athens and we still got to keep our first class seats. Even better, we got to use their first class lounge while waiting and were able to clean up and eat a nice breakfast there. Things were looking up indeed.

The flight was passable with decent Indian food but I swear half of the aircraft must have been occupied by "The Eastenders" who yelled at each other in their thick London accents and allowed their children to roll in the isles. One couple was so dumb they tried to seat their daughter on the arm rest between them! I watched a woman in line during boarding who absolutely refused to let someone out of the toilet which she was blocking. No matter how many times the person was asked to move, she refused. I was so tired that I actually dozed off during the flight numerous times in-between the little girl behind me exclaiming "Daddy" at the top of her lungs. The he would let her run up and down the isle. 

We finally got to Athens and it was still before dark so we were ready to follow my practical tips and get to the Placa as quickly as possible. After gaining our luggage and navigating our way to the metro stop we found the ATM machine where John would obtain our first supply of Euros using our USAA ATM card. This was carefully planned in advance to save money on the exchange rate and avoid ATM fees. For years we simply used a credit card with a zero balance. Right before a trip to Europe I would send a payment to that credit card to create a credit balance large enough to cover cash withdrawals for the entire trip. Finally the credit card companies quit allowing customers to make payments over the amount actually due. That was a minor tragedy because it worked like a charm and we were never charged any fees at all. So I opened a checking account with USAA because they have no ATMs of their own and therefore reimburse their customers the cost of any ATM fees charged using their card. It's the next best thing but I can't get around their foreign exchange fee which all banks charge. In any event, we had the USAA ATM card with the required four digit pin used in Europe and John went to the first Bankomat to collect some dough. It didn't work! Sometimes after 24 hours of travel especially with problems involved, it's easy to suddenly forget how to do something you do all the time, or forget your pin number or put the card in upside down. Whatever the reason, John could not get the card to work at all and we had no Euros with us. After his third attempt, USAA cancelled the card and wouldn't allow another try. We couldn't even get into Athens without Euros!

Our only option was to return to the airport and go to one of the rip-off currency exchange booths and trade some US dollars for Euros which John did while I waited at the metro station with the bags. I had to pee pretty bad by this time as well. Once again, we were not happy. But John got the cash and we caught the metro without issue and even found our hotel in the Placa without too much trouble. I immediately called USAA to ask for help but was told the bank was closed and I would have to call back the next day. So we were stuck with very little cash in a city which, unbeknownst to me, rarely accepts anything but cash.

That night we did manage to find a lovely little outdoor restaurant in the Placa which accepted credit cards and drank a bunch of beer before retiring to our hot tiny little room with the two tiniest twin beds I've ever seen. Earlier I had tried to figure out how to get the AC on but nothing worked so I finally called the front desk and asked what to do. I was informed that you must call the front desk if you want air-conditioning but he didn't think it was very hot. I told him I was very hot and insisted he turn it on. And believe it or not, that hotel cost well over 100.00 Euros per night. It had the typical tiny shower that John can't even fit into and you can't flush the toilet paper down the toilet! They required that you put it in the waste basket which is one of the most disgusting things about visiting Greece. I fail to understand a country which is fully modern and 21st century with all of the same technology that we have cannot figure out how to make toilets that can flush toilet paper. Using a public toilet in Greece is a real treat, I tell you, well not actually. It's awful.

The next day I was very anxious to see the sights because we had only one touring day. The cost of that hotel was so expensive that I had to reduce our desire to spend four nights to spending only two and then get out of town. Top on my list was the Acropolis, of course, followed by the Roman and Greek Agoras and the museum in the Greek Agora. Since every one of these sights is located in the same place, it seemed very doable. I called USAA first but was told they would have to issue a new PIN number and it would take another 24 hours. John was worried we wouldn't have enough money for the train out of Athens the next day and said we'd have to be very careful with our cash. So we set off bright and early to visit the Acropolis first. We wandered the maze of streets in the Placa following a back route John had found on the map and then started to climb the mountain gradually on cobbled residential streets which rise one half the way up the Acropolis. Finally we reached a wide paved road which looked promising and headed the wrong way. Then we turned around and began searching for any signs of an entrance or a ticket booth.

When we finally found the ticket booth and asked for two tickets the lady in the booth said "No credit cards". The tickets were quite expensive at twelve euros each so John announced we would have to skip it! I was beside myself and reminded him that we had traveled 10,000 miles to see the Acropolis. I tried to think of ways to get cash with our credit card such as buying a guide book at one of the many shops nearby and getting extra cash but he was convinced that none would accept credit cards either. So we went all the way to Athens and didn't get to visit the Acropolis. We did the next best thing though. We continued around the mountain and found a giant rock with people all over it which overlooked the Greek Agora and had a great view of the Parthenon. There was a sign stating that St. Paul had preached the gospel from that rock so we walked on it ourselves. Then we went back down the mountain into the Placa to visit the two Agoras (forums in Rome) but one was closed and actually looked abandoned and the other took cash only so we gave up.

The city of Athens had recently beautified their city for the Olympics and created a wonderful walking path all the way around the base of the Acropolis and the agoras going all the way to the other side to the temple of Hercules so John and I followed the path and got a good look at the Greek Agora, nice distance views of the Acropolis and some interesting Byzantine churches opposite. We walked all the way to the temple which we couldn't visit closer because it was cash only but got some nice photos of it as well. Then we found a wonderful taverna on the side of the Acropolis in that residential neighborhood where we started the day and sat on a tiny balcony for two eating platters of medzes (appetizers) with a giant bottle of ice cold water and a liter of ice cold white wine which was absolutely delicious. Our day in Athens was very pleasant and the remainder of our trip through Greece's Peleponnese followed by our first Greek Cruise was fabulous. Of course, not visiting the Acropolis created another monkey on my back which I would not be happy until it was removed.

After three Greek cruises, I finally found one that returned to Athens, which was the main reason I chose it. This is the cruise that we just took from Venice on our last vacation in May. I was ready this time and planned everything out very carefully as usual to make sure nothing went wrong. Other than there being no bus ticket booth at the port nor bus tickets sold by newstands everything went very smoothly. There was an Bankomat near the bus stop so John could get more euros. The bus came almost immediately and the driver gave us a free ride to the metro station. We got right on the metro and it whisked us into Athens but some tracks were down so we had to make an unexpected train change. No biggie. We had gotten a nice early start and arrived at the Acropolis metro stop by 8:30AM. We beat the crowds, especially the tour bus crowds which were at that time stuck in rush hour traffic jams. This was going to be good.

Athens has a brand new Acropolis Museum which is right above the metro stop and can't be missed. It contains all of the artifacts found at the Acropolis and is very well designed and laid out. The modern three story building has glass floors in many places so you can look down onto the sights below. On the ground floor at the entrance you are actually walking over archeologists working on digging out ancient streets no doubt uncovered by the excavation for the new museum. It's very cool. The museum is filled with natural light by the enormous floor to ceiling windows and the pieces are well displayed, most with signs in English. The original four Caryatids which adorned the Erectheon are on display in this museum and a sight to behold. You can walk right up to the giant statues which once adorned the cupola over the Parthenon and see how enormous they actually are. I could have spent all day in that museum but we had the Acropolis waiting and my monkey had to go. We ended up spending two hours there as it was and unfortunately by the time we climbed up to the entrance of the Acropolis, the tour buses had arrived.

I knew when planning our day we should have seen the Acropolis first before the crowds but I didn't want to climb the mountain twice which we would have had to do to see it first, climb down one side to see the museum, and then back up and over to the other side for the agoras. This was too much climbing in the heat without shade of any kind so we chose to see the museum first to my regret. When we entered the Acropolis and began climbing the grand stairs, there are eighty five I believe, we went at a crawl and had to make frequent stops because there were so many people on the stairs who kept stopping to take pictures with their cell phones and others who got tired there was just no way around them. It was very frustrating trying to marvel at this ancient sight with 10,000 of my new best friends but I made the best of it. By the time we got to the top it was impossible to even get a snapshot of the gigantic Temple of Venus which we had arrived through because it was hidden behind the crowds. The Parthenon is so huge it's impossible to capture in one photo so it required several different angles and ends all of which were loaded with people. I did manage a photo of the Erectheon without people but it took several attempts after waiting patiently for someone to have their picture taken then they would stand or walk directly in front of me while I took mine. Arggg! But I didn't care because the monkey was now off my back and it only took four years. Also, I feel complete that I've seen it and done that and won't ever feel the need to see it again.

On the other hand, I still want to visit the Roman and Greek Agoras as well as the National Museum which contains almost all the major ancient artifacts from the entire country! We were going to attempt to do all of this that day but after lunch. We headed next to the same taverna we had enjoyed before but were lured into a fine little place with a rooftop terrace and had a wonderful lunch and a liter of ice cold white wine. It was so delightful there surrounded by bouganvellia and a nice soft breeze that we had another liter of cold white wine while contemplating the hard road ahead. John and I both came to the same conclusion that the National Museum was out. It required just too much walking to get to from the metro stop and neither of us could face another giant museum that day. We both agreed to save it for next time. However, we still agreed to visit the agoras, which were nearby so after lunch we walked down to the Roman Agora which was inexplicably closed. There was no sign of explanation so we continued to the Greek Agora which is far more important, larger and more interesting but it was closed as well! There was a sign stating that it closed at 3:00PM but my practical tips gleaned from the Athens tourism website and confirmed by two Athens guidebooks stated that the Greek Agora is open until 8:00PM. Oh well, there was nothing we could do about it so we decided to sit at one of the dozen outside bars across from the agora and have some beer before heading back to Piraeus and our ship.

We felt that our day had been a success and know that we will return in the near future to Athens and get those minor monkeys off our backs when we do. Maybe if Greece can solve their economic problems in the meantime their hotels might become a bit more competitive with the rest of Europe? One can always be hopeful.

Kaleeneekhta